Friday, 16 August 2013

untitled musing


“Des Esseintes also derived a specious pleasure from handling this minuscule booklet, with its covers of Japanese felt as white as milk curds, fastened by two silk cords, one Chinese pink, the other black. Concealed behind the binding, the black braid met the pink braid which, like some licentious handmaid, added a whisper of powder, a suggestion of modern Japanese rouge, to the antique whiteness, the artless flesh-tints of the book; it would itself round the pink, intertwining its sombre colour with the light one in a dainty bow, and introducing a discreet hint of that regret, a vague threat of that sadness which follow in the wake of burnt-out passion and satiated sensual frenzy.” 

(Joris-Karl Huysmans, À rebours, trans. by Margaret Mauldon)


常玉畫作:雙裸女,1929年。
Sanyu, Two Pink Nudes, oil on canvas, 1929 (via Ravenel Art)


“However, by delving into his own mind, he first of all grasped that, to appeal to him, a work must possess that aura of strangeness which Edgar Allan Poe required; but he readily ventured further along that path, demanding over-subtle creations of the intellect and complex deliquescences of language; what he wanted was a disturbing ambivalence he could muse about, until he chose to make it either vaguer or more precise, according to his state of mind at that particular moment. In a word, he wanted a work of art both for what it intrinsically was and for what it potentially allowed him to impart to it; he wanted to go forward with it and because of it, as if aided by an acolyte, as if transported in a vehicle, into a sphere where sublimated feelings would induce in him a state of turmoil which was unexpected, and the causes of which he would, over a long period, try—though quite in vain—to analyse.” (ibid)

常玉畫作:鏡前母與子,1930年代。
Sanyu, Virgin Mary and the Infant Jesus, oil on canvas, 1930s (via Sotheby's HK)

我的生命中一無所有,我只是一個畫家。對於我的作品,我認為毋須賦予任何解釋,當觀賞我的作品時,應該清楚瞭解我所要表達的... 只是一個簡單的概念。~常玉
“I have nothing in my life, I am merely a painter. Regarding my works, I do not think explanations are necessary. When looking at my paintings, one should understand with clarity, what I am trying to express... is but a simple concept.” —Sanyu






Death and ecstasy... “[Art] is about connecting with human beings emotionally, not intellectually.” (Tamara Rojo)

Friday, 7 June 2013

Evening Prayer & Sensation


Oraison du Soir

Je vis assis, tel qu'un ange aux mains d'un barbier,
Empoignant une chope à fortes cannelures,
L'hypogastre et le col cambrés, une Gambier
Aux dents, sous l'air gonflé d'impalpables voilures.
Tels que les excréments chauds d'un vieux colombier,
Mille Rêves en moi font de douces brûlures :
Puis par instants mon coeur triste est comme un aubier
Qu'ensanglante l'or jeune et sombre des coulures.
Puis, quand j'ai ravalé mes rêves avec soin,
Je me tourne, ayant bu trente ou quarante chopes,
Et me recueille, pour lâcher l'âcre besoin :
Doux comme le Seigneur du cèdre et des hysopes,
Je pisse vers les cieux bruns, très haut et très loin
Avec l'assentiment des grands héliotropes.

*
Evening Prayer

I spend my life sitting, like an angel in a barber's chair
Holding a beer mug with deep-cut designs
My neck and gut both bent, while in the air
A weightless veil of pipe smoke hangs.
Like steaming dung within an old dovecote
A thousand Dreams within me softly burn:
From time to time my heart is like some oak
Whose blood runs golden where a branch is torn.
And then, when I have swallowed down my Dreams
In thirty, forty mugs of beer, I turn
To satisfy a need I can't ignore,
And like the Lord of Hyssop and of Myrrh
I piss into the skies, a soaring stream
That consecrates a patch of flowering fern.


Arthur Rimbaud: Complete Works. Translated from the French by Paul Schmidt. Harper Colophon, 1976.

+++

Sensation

Par les soirs bleus d'été, j'irai dans les sentiers,
Picoté par les blés, fouler l'herbe menue :
Rêveur, j'en sentirai la fraîcheur à mes pieds.
Je laisserai le vent baigner ma tête nue.

Je ne parlerai pas, je ne penserai rien :
Mais l'amour infini me montera dans l'âme,
Et j'irai loin, bien loin, comme un bohémien,
Par la Nature, -- heureux comme avec une femme.

*
Through blue summer nights, I will pass along paths,
Getting pricked by wheat, trampling short grass:
Dreaming, I will feel coolness underfoot,
Will let breezes bathe my bare head.

Not a word, not a thought:
Boundless love will surge through my soul,
And I will wander far away, a vagabond,
In Nature, -- as happily as with a woman.


~"Sensation," by Arthur Rimbaud, March 1870. From Rimbaud Complete, translated and edited by Wyatt Mason and published by Scribner (2003).



Thursday, 9 May 2013

Poetry Pairing (series i): petals & gardens in flames~"Though It Be Thy Will" & "Self-embrace on Silk Prayer"


One communicates and exchanges in poetry, as in music, as in silence...


Though It Be Thy Will

by Abdias DeMarin

(Special thanks to Graceful-Jen for providing the lament
that served as its humourous counterpointe)


Though it be thy will to wrest thy breast from mine,
Though no Roman heart can make Sabian claim,
My pate is parched from excess prate and pine,
Such showes bring shame and diminish my fame.
At first light found a golden garden gave to me,
Lillie nymphs umteen litt'ring shade of tree,
The dewy petals rolled with fond embrace,
their kisses painting the tears on my face.
When bored with the bevy the breeze answered all,
Did a hundred more nymphs from the branches fall,
In beauty's bower, thus burdened with bliss,
I nearly forgave thy deeds gone amiss.
My love for thee is like a sorrowe blinde,
Obscur'ng the garden within my minde,
Though beauty is thine, 'tis a hair of the world's,
Nor canst thou wrest me, 'tis a flame unfurled.

+++

*Where are the songs of spring? Ay, where are they?
Think not of them, thou hast thy music too, — (Keats, To Autumn)*



The Roses of Heliogabalus (1888), by Sir Lawrence Alma-Tadema,
oil on canvas, 132.1 x 213.7 cm, private collection.
As it was painted during the winter, Tadema arranged to have roses sent weekly from the French Riviera for four months to ensure the accuracy of each petal.




Self-embrace on Silk Prayer

by Ting-Jen Hwang, on 8th January 2012

(With thanks to Hamlet-at-Sea of this incarnation, 
for being the final catalyst of my poem.)


"Is it a blessing for a poet to be a natural poet-magnet?"
The romantic thinker wonders to herself.
'Oh you Little Fool,' she whispered,
A foolish thinker I am.

All these men, coming
in and out of me. All this pleasure and pain,
flickering like dying blue flames.
An instant garden trampled upon for hundreds of years
by those he loves with his Life-ah, such blasphemous
Beauty. An instant paradise turned
into the most exquisite ice ablaze.
A bruised garden amidst the flames.
The love and devotion that it takes to create
-such Beauty-
I can never fully comprehend.

Threads of a thousand hues are weaving themselves 
in and out of each other; breathing esoteric, 
breathing erotic, into
the weakest Bird of the most powerful strength-
A Bird without a name-

Can I be spared-Can I be
abstract like your patterns of this mesmerising nature, again?
I plead with my heart to be
as romantic and as abstract, like
your Little Brother, again.
Tears from the eyes of his heart are still rolling,
shining on my quill 
like dews on those pink Oleander flowers-
falling, falling, fallen. 

(And in case you were wondering, I was not speaking of 
your little brother, I was speaking of
Mine. Like all these quests for Beauty and pleasure-I was
speaking, and thinking, of Mine.)

Breathing erotic. Breathing esoteric.
All these fiery blossoms burning way below sub-zero,
I could faint,
just listening to them.

Friday, 25 January 2013

Voice Poetry: my recording of "Self-embrace on Silk Prayer"


I have always loved hearing the sounds of poetry: reciting quietly to myself, listening to poetry recordings, and those lovely songs set to poems as well as lyrics composed for music. Being particularly drawn to, and as a firm believer in, the "poetic essence" in written words (and in all artistic mediums), I love reciting and hearing the sounds of many different literary genres, not restricted to poetry-this awakens in me the beautiful psychological state of "flow"...

Here is a recording I made the other day reciting my recent poem Self-embrace on Silk Prayer. It was my first attempt at recording my poetry. :-)


宋徽宗,欲借風霜二詩帖。
Huizong's poem and exquisite Dancing Crane/ Slender Gold calligraphy, 
Northern Song dynasty.

Adagio of Thyrsus' Seduction


Fallen leaves from the maple tree slowly consumed
like a melody, into meticulous scales scattered on soft earth.
Blushing petals floating whirling dancing twisting in welkin,
delicately weaving heaven.
What is bound by faded rose gold are memories sealed
in the arms of wood;
What mesmerises from underneath that silken surface
pliably embraces the tree-
in soft compliance, nibbling ancient bark.

Paradise, featherlight, touches his earth,
gazing upon the heaviness of her kiss standing lifted
by branches of ethereality.



Tuesday, 8 January 2013

Self-embrace on Silk Prayer


*With thanks to Hamlet-at-Sea of this incarnation, for being the final catalyst of my poem.


"Is it a blessing for a poet to be a natural poet-magnet?"
The romantic thinker wonders to herself.
'Oh you Little Fool,' she whispered,
A foolish thinker I am.

All these men, coming
in and out of me. All this pleasure and pain,
flickering like dying blue flames.
An instant garden trampled upon for hundreds of years
by those he loves with his Life-ah, such blasphemous
Beauty. An instant paradise turned
into the most exquisite ice ablaze.
A bruised garden amidst the flames.
The love and devotion that it takes to create
-such Beauty-
I can never fully comprehend.

Threads of a thousand hues are weaving themselves
in and out of each other; breathing esoteric,
breathing erotic, into
the weakest Bird of the most powerful strength-
A Bird without a name-

Can I be spared-Can I be
abstract like your patterns of this mesmerising nature, again?
I plead with my heart to be
as romantic and as abstract, like
your Little Brother, again.
Tears from the eyes of his heart are still rolling,
shining on my quill
like dews on those pink Oleander flowers-
falling, falling, fallen.

(And in case you were wondering, I was not speaking of
your little brother, I was speaking of
Mine. Like all these quests for Beauty and pleasure-I was
speaking, and thinking, of Mine.)

Breathing erotic. Breathing esoteric.
All these fiery blossoms burning way below sub-zero,
I could faint,
just listening to them.


I have no refuge in the world other than thy threshold.
There is no protection for my head other than this door.
~Hafiz
(inscription on the Ardabil Carpet)

+See also Lisa Creagh's Floriculture 1 and the artist's website.


Friday, 30 November 2012

香奈兒

Here is another new short poem written for 小草 Xiao-Tsao (Young Grass) Academy...


<香奈兒>

她的愛,一位遠見卓識家的前瞻夢想
是夜間飛舞的蝴蝶 幻化自白晝舒坦的毛蟲 
皆合一:似色彩、似樂音
純白光線藉由菱鏡反射出無限絢爛輝澤,那孕育著一切的潔白明光
如聖心堂的玻璃 夏卡爾筆下五彩的穹蒼 
巴黎歌劇院流溢出的細碎舞步與音符
皆源起與終止於無盡的黑與白 純粹絕對之美
黑與白 最完美的和諧

「自由, 一件華美莊嚴的禮物。」
 “Freedom, a magnificent gift.” ~Coco Chanel


Coco Chanel in 1910


Wednesday, 28 November 2012

Words, Poems, Reveries, Muse


Yamanoue no Okura, “A Lament on the Evanescence of Life”

What we must accept
  as we journey through the world
Is that time will pass
  like the waters of a stream;
in countless numbers,
in relentless succession,
it will besiege us
  with assaults we must endure.
They would not detain
  the period of their bloom
when, as maidens will,
they who were then maidens
  encircled their wrists
    with gemmed bracelets from Cathay,
and took their pleasure
  frolicking hand in hand
    with their youthful friends.
So the months and years went by,
and when did it fall –
that sprinkling of wintry frost
  on glistening hair
    as black as leopard flower seeds?
And whence did they come –
those wrinkles that settled in,
marring the smoothness
  of blushing pink faces?
Was it forever,
the kind of life those others led –
those stalwart men,
who, as fine young men will do,
girded at their waists
  sharp swords, keen-bladed weapons,
took up hunting bows,
clasped them tight in their clenched fists,
placed on red horses
  saddles fashioned of striped hemp,
climbed onto their steeds,
and rode gaily here and there?
they were not many,
those nights when the fine young men
  pushed open the doors,
the plank doors of the chamber
  where the maidens slept,
groped their way close to their loves,
and slept with their arms
  intertwined with gemlike arms.
Yet already now
  those who were maidens and youths
    must use walking sticks,
and when they walk over there,
others avoid them,
and when they walk over here,
others show distaste.
Such is life, it seems, for the old.
Precious though life is,
it is beyond our power
  to stay the passing of time.

(Translated by Steven D. Carter)

***

*A poem I read back in July, which instantly drew me in with its mysterious strength and powerful imagery. (Re-reading it after a discussion with David about Monet's artistic treatment of water and the place Giverny, and yes, I still love it - it glistens with a sense of transience in beauty and anguished sadness for Eternal Recurrence.)

“The Rose-Way in Giverny,” by Virginia Konchan

And in the reticulate distance
the cued inertia of Lucifer
astounds. Our feet bleed:
buoyant, the body at its task.
What you wanted was what I 
wanted-slant of sun to the left,
twinkling of civilization elsewise;
and the moon (whelp of history)
to our backs, all come-hither
and dream. Motion understood 
is philosophy deferred: peace;
the felt pathos of space and time.
Look, darling, at the establishing
shot. It's downright Biblical,
this thrown-together vista,
world upon world without end.

***

“Without any wind blowing, the sheer weight of a raindrop, shining in parasitic luxury on a cordate leaf, caused its tip to dip, and what looked like a globule of quicksilver performed a sudden glissando down the centre vein, and then, having shed its bright load, the relieved leaf unbent. Tip, leaf, dip, relief — the instant it all took to happen seemed to me not so much a fraction of time as a fissure in it, a missed heartbeat, which was refunded at once by a patter of rhymes: I say 'patter' intentionally, for when a gust of wind did come, the trees would briskly start to drip all together in as crude an imitation of the recent downpour as the stanza I was already muttering resembled the shock of wonder I had experienced when for a moment heart and leaf had been one.”

“I confess I do not believe in time. I like to fold my magic carpet, after use, in such a way as to superimpose one part of the pattern upon another. Let visitors trip. And the highest enjoyment of timelessness—in a landscape selected at random—is when I stand among rare butterflies and their food plants. This is ecstasy, and behind the ecstasy is something else, which is hard to explain. It is like a momentary vacuum into which rushes all that I love. A sense of oneness with sun and stone. A thrill of gratitude to whom it may concern—to the contrapuntal genius of human fate or to tender ghosts humoring a lucky mortal.”

—Vladimir Nabakov, Speak, Memory

***

While under the bridges
Of embrace expire
Eternal tired tidal eyes

The night is a clock chiming
The days go by not I

Love elapses like the river
Love goes by
Poor life is indolent
And expectation always violent

The night is a clock chiming
The days go by not I

The days and equally the weeks elapse
The past remains the past
Love remains lost
Under Mirabeau Bridge the river slips away

The night is a clock chiming
The days go by not I

-Guillaume Apollinaire

Julien Dillens, Marbre, Figura tombale - Femme au bouquet (1885-1889), Musées Royaux des Beaux-Arts de Belgique
***

my love for you makes you ancient
to me. my greatest wish would be
that I were to you,

ancient, too. that looking upon
each other, the waters of old rome
would be seen trickling beneath our
feet, not

that we would live forever, but that
we already have.

—from a poem by Ricky Garni

***

"He seeks life where it is to be found: in all that is most delicate, in the folds of things."
...
-Hugo von Hofmannsthal, Andreas, 1932

***

As Distant Music, Obscurely, or But Half Revealed...

During this state of repose, he took his station winter and summer by the stove, looking through the window at the old tower of Lobenicht, not that he could be said properly to see it, but the tower rested upon his eye as distant music on the ear - obscurely, or but half revealed to the consciousness. No words seem forcible enough to express his sense of the gratification which he derived from his old tower, when seen under the circumstances of twilight and quiet reverie... At length some poplars in a neighboring garden shot up to such a height as to obscure the tower, upon which Kant became very uneasy and restless, and at length found himself positively unable to pursue his evening meditiations. Fortunately, the proprietor of the garden was a very considerate and obliging person, who had, besides, a high regard for Kant, and accordingly, upon a presentation of the case being made to him, he gave orders that the poplar should be cropped. Kant recovered his equanimity, and once more found himself able to pursue his twilight meditations in peace.

Thomas de Quincey — The Last Days of Immanuel Kant — via the liner notes for Gavin Bryars' After the Requiem.

***

My sky
interchanges with yours,
so does my dove
now
it flies over yours,
I see two shadows
falling
in
the oatfield
We look with
each other’s eyes,
we find
a place:
rain
we say
like a story
the half-sentence
green,
I hear:
Your mouth
with the speech
of birds
carries twigs and feathers
up to my brow

—Johannes Bobrowski

Sappho
***

Part One...

"Any great realization is only half completed in the brain's pool of light; the other half is formed in the dark soil of our innermost being, and above all it is a state of the soul on whose furthest tip the thought sits perched, like a flower..."

~ Robert Musil, Young Torless

***

Suddenly, softly, as if a breath breathed
On the pale wall, a magical apparition,
The shadow of the jasmine, branch and blossom!

It was not there, it is there, in a perfect image;
And all is changed. It is like a memory lost
Returning without a reason into the mind...

And it seems to me that the beauty of the shadow
Is more beautiful than the flower; a strange beauty,
Pencilled and silently deepening to distinctness.

As a memory stealing out of the mind's slumber,
A memory floating up from a dark water,
Can be more beautiful than the thing remembered.

~ Laurence Binyon (1869-1943)

***

On almost the incendiary eve
When at your lips and keys,
Locking, unlocking, the murdered strangers weave……..
On almost the incendiary eve
Of deaths and entrances,
When near and strange wounded on London’s waves
Have sought your single grave,
One enemy, of many, who knows well
Your heart is luminous
In the watched dark, quivering ….

— From Deaths & Entrances: Dylan Thomas

***

EN:TRANCES

What is the allure and attraction which so invites the photographer to capture entrances?
I feel it strongly and I cannot adequately explain it- through the last two decades as a semi-serious photographer I am drawn to capture the magic of what may lay beyond. The other, the secret, the forbidden—perhaps even the sexual or inticingly erotic?
Closed doors represent a world where we need use our imagination to its fullest. We see the promise of new colour and new experience—a closed glimpse of the exotic ‘other’ life we wish to inhabit. (via Lushlight)

***

且也相與吾之耳矣,庸詎知吾所謂吾之乎?且汝夢為鳥而厲乎天,夢為魚而沒於淵。不識今之言者,其覺者乎,其夢者乎?造適不及笑,獻笑不及排,安排而去化,乃入於寥天一。
(況且人們交往總借助形骸而稱述自我,又怎麼知道我所稱述的軀體一定就是我呢?而且你夢中變成鳥便振翅直飛藍天,你夢中變成魚便搖尾潛入深淵。不知道今天我們說話的人,算是醒悟的人呢,還是做夢的人呢?心境快適卻來不及笑出聲音,表露快意發出笑聲卻來不及排解和消洩,安於自然的推移而且忘卻死亡的變化,於是就進入到寂寥空虛的自然而渾然成為一體。)

~莊子內篇<大宗師>;張耿光釋義

***

荀子性惡篇:「人之性惡,其善者偽也。今人之性,生而有好利焉,順是,故爭奪生而辭讓亡焉;生而有疾惡焉,順是,故殘賊生而忠信亡焉;生而有耳目之欲,有好聲色焉,順是,故淫亂生而禮義文理亡焉。然則從人之性,順人之情,必出於爭奪,合於犯分亂理,而歸於暴,故必將有師法之化,禮義之道,然後出於辭讓,合於文理,而歸於治。用此觀之,然則,人之性惡,明矣。其善者偽也。」

***

金剛經:「一切有為法,如夢幻泡影,如露亦如電,應作如是觀。」

"How should he explain it? As in the sky: Stars, darkness, a lamp, a phantom, dew, a bubble. A dream, a flash of lightning, and a cloud-thus we should look upon the world (all that was made). Thus he should explain; therefore it is said: He should explain."

~Vajracchedikā Prajñāpāramitā Sūtra, or Diamond-Cutter (from Prajnaparamita/ Perfection of Wisdom genre), English translations by E.B. Cowell, F. Max Mulller, and J. Takakusu.

***

One of my very favourite performances of Svetlana Zakharova: her mystery, her sensuality, her musicality and the suspenseful poetry... This personal love affair of mine is ongoing, and only growing stronger (I am led-in hands and heart-and "possessed" by such passion for this poetic muse). She takes my breath away.

"...[a beauty which] is a consummate example of poetic inspiration, eliciting from the poet's soul a sigh which is at once the poem itself-Dante's response to Beatrice's presence-and a resigned acknowledgement of her transcendent otherness." (Many thanks to Leanne & Cassandra for this.)

The Body of Beatrice, by Robert P. Harrison

Thursday, 25 October 2012

Poetry Feature: Disbelief, Women, Minority, Periphery


Thirteen of my poems, including five pairs originally composed in Chinese and later translated into English (for most with a very long gap of time in between), are featured in Peripheral Surveys' beautiful autumn anniversary edition: Disbelief, Women, Minority, Periphery. Some of my readers (any of you out there...? ;p) might have already come across these poems in my little blog here, but the set is presented in such a visually aesthetic manner and the journal itself is a rich literary and artistic gem to delve into; hence I am linking it here to my poetic-oneiric (barely awake) space. My poetry is here. I have also written some notes on the inspirations behind the poetry and process of my translations, which for me is very much like re-creating again, for a few of the Chinese poems featured in the journal. The notes can be found in my blog post here.


Kenro Izu, Blue series, Still Life 1119b, 2004 (via)

My dear poet-philosopher-musician friend Alain Minod shared this exquisite, musical beauty with me the other day. For me, music is salvation, it is paradise. As Schopenhauer once said, what distinguishes our aesthetic consciousness from the ordinary one is that it lifts, however temporarily, the veil of perception, or maya, and blesses us with glimpses of what is transcendent, what is eternal, what is real and true, the ultimate beauty and truth. In this sense, our aesthetic experience/consciousness is similar in its essence to meditation. How is life possible without music, when life is music...?

“Yet how strange a thing is the beauty of music! The brief beauty that the player brings into being transforms a given period of time into pure continuance; it is certain never to be repeated; like the existence of dayflies and other such short-lived creatures, beauty is a perfect abstraction and creation of life itself. Nothing is so similar to life as music.”
~Mishima Yukio

*See also Peripheral Surveys' archive of past issues.

Tuesday, 23 October 2012

*


I do not love you except because I love you;
I go from loving to not loving you,
From waiting to not waiting for you
My heart moves from cold to fire.

I love you only because it's you the one I love;
I hate you deeply, and hating you
Bend to you, and the measure of my changing love for you
Is that I do not see you but love you blindly.

Maybe January light will consume
My heart with its cruel
Ray, stealing my key to true calm.

In this part of the story I am the one who
Dies, the only one, and I will die of love because I love you,
Because I love you, Love, in fire and blood.

~Pablo Neruda

Alfred Stieglitz, Georgia O’Keeffe, Hands and Horse Skull, 1931
*via: The Metropolitan Museum of Art

Saturday, 6 October 2012

眩暈 Vertigo (from the poetic-oneiric archive)


*Read a poem by Arthur Rimbaud and was reminded of this from the archive—an old piece written more than eleven years ago. Rimbaud's poem to follow after Vertigo and image.


(Memories from a Subconscious Nightmare...)

It is the most lavish fragrance, the most devitalising. Does it make me want to kill? Or does it make me want to breathe. I could as if smell the flushes of crimson, and then they paled my hearing into avalanching silences. The silence was so poisonous, so decaying, so huge and hopeless; eclipsing all that was morally good or vital to my health—ceaselessly. It was my angel, my angel with waxen wings. "Was ascension such an unreachable dream?" Asked my angel. It was such a dark night, so dark that it blinded me. It blinded everything. The incandescence of the deepest night had burned the last speck of sombre stars with a lurid smile of bitter sarcasm. This humid and luxurious beauty, this lavish and choking fragrance, brought my extreme disgust and happiness into life and married them with the witness of my very own eye. May I shed my tears, which would never again be produced artificially? Or may I burst out laughing hysterically? If only I could cry out with the slightest sadness. Now this fragrance has turned its own veins into the most ecstatic earthly joy that seems so very vague, and yet so very real. Now this fragrance has left the residue in me the deepest grief. Could I have ever tasted an emotion as sharp? Or am I creating my indifferent tears woven so meticulously into my words—a world that can only be sensed visually but blindly, and can only be conceived of with such a harsh sound by an avalanching silence. I was about to woo, to woo this devitalising fragrance. And I was about to kill, to kill my angel after all the pleasure of worldliness has decayed to its core.

And now, I hear the river flowing in my body, with liquid so dark and polluted that I can hardly distinguish it from the unbounded night and the deceptively purified dream I am in. I have accumulated all my energy just to feel the retardation and inadequacy in me again, yet again. And now I hear your voice, my dearest pantomimist. Now I hear your voice, singing my song for me. You have given me a qualm, a qualitative change, and I can not even ask you to stay, to see me through the whole process—the whole process of passing. Yesterday we screamed together. I could almost feel your etherealisation, so beauteous you nauseated me. I wish I could cry, and ascend to the heavenly hell you have been presenting to me over and over again. Until I can no longer mumble, will I be led into a perfectly muted world, where I can only see your white sand dune, where I can only feel the flow of your words and murmurs of your voice crawling back into my blood, where I can only touch every single sound of your decaying petals by visualising my own pantomime. Now I see you bleeding, the sweetest nectar. Will I dream on? While you live on.

And the next second I woke up soaking wet. 

(Written on 28/June/2001.)


+++

Arthur Rimbaud, “Anguish”

Is it possible that She will have me forgiven for ambitions continually crushed,—that an affluent end will make up for the ages of indigence,—that a day of success will lull us to sleep on the shame of our fatal incompetence?

(O palms! diamond!—Love! strength!—higher than all joys and all fame!—in any case, everywhere—demon, god,—Youth of this being: myself!)

That the accidents of scientific wonders and the movements of social brotherhood will be cherished as the progressive restitution of our original freedom?…

But the Vampire who makes us behave orders us to enjoy ourselves with what she leaves us, or in other words to be more amusing.

Rolled in our wounds through the wearing air and the sea; in torments through the silence of the murderous waters and air; in tortures that laugh in the terrible surge of their silence.

(Translated by Louise Varese)

Tuesday, 25 September 2012

Agon without a Name


You pierced me

with a repeated force that was lighter
than what was bearable,
that felt less than paradise;
more than an imagined perception ―
sundered wholeness,
emoted affliction.

Inside my orchid flower was your truth,
your heaven that would not open.
I could not.

Those sounds of love, those sighs of love,
endless breaths of love, cascading noises of love,
resigning, removing, rising, falling...
upon the pressure of a finger
and the touch of a palm.

Words extend, they press their lips
on the pain
of an ever-growing tree branch,
curve of my neck,
and yet the leaves would not tremble,
sunlight could not devote.

I loved, and I vibrated;
I inhaled, and I exhaled,
in a way your intensification of my head
did not reveal
the flesh surrounding my heart,
and would not enter
the sculpture of me,
I could not.
A sculpture I was not.

Your fingers glided
like a starving butterfly
over my ribcage,
brushing against vertebrae of my spine,
penetrating the insides of my mind.
With the strength of ephemeral gunpowder,
like quicksilver carefully preserved
and dangerously sealed
in a glass tube.

Whose sorrowful pretence?

The subtleties and vagueness
of my self for you,
sadly it was not.
Fleeting, and yet not,
never fast.
Will never last.

Since it must be so,
no one remembered more
than what they could hope
to forget.
And what would have been my wound
when I was closest to the sun,
closest
to the reflection
of the palest moon?


The Persian Prince Humay Meeting the Chinese Princess Humayun in a Garden, circa 1450, by Junayd, Persian miniature painting on silk. © Bridgeman Art Library / Musee des Arts Decoratifs, Paris, France / Giraudon

Friday, 21 September 2012

丘壑,頸項,島嶼:metaphoric hills & vales, symbolic napes & islands


Wherever I look you are islands
a constellation of flowers breathing on the sea
deep-forested islands mountainous and fragrant
fires on a bright ocean
at the root one fire
all my life I have wanted to touch your ankle
running down to its shore
I beach myself on you
I listen
I see you among still leaves
regard of rock pool
by sun and moon and stars
island waterfalls and their echoes
are your voice your shoulders the whole of you standing
and you turn to me as though your feet were in mist
flowers birds same colors
as your breath
the flowers deliberately smell of you
and the birds make their feathers
not to fly but to
feel of you

~W. S. Merwin, 'Islands'



Saturday, 8 September 2012

Polygon of Love


This inverted triangle begins
with luminosity
the pearl from Avalon.
Breaths of breathless love ceaselessly flirting,
seducing your Utopian stars,
extending thighs of sighs on the sides.
They die
in morning sunlight;
half awake, half asleep.
Over the stretched dome of skies,
a transparent line closes her air
atop
with the unseen, the unfelt:
a non-collinear,
unique plane
of pearlescent shadows.
Watercolours of a forgotten equinox
in Shambhala.

As the darkened tunnel leading to Utopian vertex
narrows and narrows
and narrows, to almost a disappearance
An Atlantis made of sea rocks with iridescent silver lights
glistening, shimmering, a little gloworm,
whence a flow of Klimt's golden liquid
releases,
vertigo ensues, pleasure remains,
tear stains and a ballet of smiles,
emeralds of burning Absinthe intensified with refined sugar.
(...hallucinations of two hearts...)

They crave ecstasy, distilled
and stilled with Orpheus' music.
I wish I knew the melodies,
what it felt like,
the tryst inside of me.

8' Sep' 2012


This new short poem of mine was inspired partially by the beautifully imaginative creations of jewellery artist Janet Theresa Miller -- her "Whispers of Atlantis" series. I think I must be obsessed with the collection as I cannot seem to get the exquisite imageries and forms out of my mind...


Nymphs Finding the Head of Orpheus, by John William Waterhouse

Tuesday, 4 September 2012

An early poem of mine, and Georges Bataille's words...


*About that lone rose flowering in snow, in the deep of winter, flushed and intoxicated with foolishly drunken ecstasy... Those flickering, dying flames setting her ablaze...*

The frozen time, stagnated, you are
the language, flowing for ever. You are
blinded by the black mists. There is a dim light, tinkling.
But seeing through your eyes,
the world is swooning and blurred.
A flower dies in the blink of an eye, and
a flower blooms in the withered twilight.
...... 流光

*     *     *



"And I think that in literature we can see the human perspective in its entirety, because literature doesn't permit us to live without seeing human nature under its most violent aspect. [...] And finally, it's literature that makes it possible for us to perceive the worst and learn how to confront it, how to overcome. In short, a man who plays finds in the game the force to overcome what the game contains of horror."


The night is my nudity
the stars are my teeth
I throw myself among the dead
dressed in white sunlight

~Georges Bataille, "I throw myself among the dead," from The Impossible




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